Chieftain Columns

Columnists . . . are jackals and no jackal has been known to live on grass once he had learned about meat — no matter who killed the meat for him.

Ernest Hemingway

From August 1996 to January 1998 I penned a biweekly column entitled "On the Trail" for the Wallowa County Chieftain (some columns were occasionally picked up by other publications).

I was abruptly (at least in my opinion) fired. The editor said it was due to financial constraints, but I was immediately replaced.

It was perhaps the cumulative effect of the columns (some subscriptions were lost and I'm sure the editor took lots of shit). If so, the final straw was likely column #40 ("Gender-bender chemical may make men less manly") which was submitted but never run. The column explored penis size, sperm counts, hermaphrodites and the feminization of males, and masculinization of females, due to chemicals in the environment (hey, I warned the readers up-front).

The Columns

 #1 So-called "War on the West" a myth
 #2 Removing hooved locusts from the public trough
 #3 Re-Educating Smokey Bear on merits of fire
 #4 Livestock major factor in unhealthy forests
 #5 Clean Streams Initiative Deserves Your Vote
 #6 Lions and hunters and bears, oh my!
 #7 Urban issues also get attention of environmentalists
 #8 If Costa Rica can do it, surely so can Oregon
 #9 Avoiding war and helping farmers, industry and environment
 #10 Money grows faster than trees
 #11 Welcome back the wolf
 #12 Environmentalists reaching out to green Republicans
 #13 Abolish the Bonneville Power Administration
 #14 Reallocating the Forest Service budget
 #15 Taxpayer-funded animal slaughter obsolete
 #16 It's time to de-road the National Forest system
 #17 Fund federal forests with recreation receipts
 #18 Hikers need to pay fair share
 #19 The argument in favor of industrial hemp
 #20 "Home on the Range" an environmental folk song
 #21 Reinvesting in Oregon's natural infrastructure
 #22 It's time to replace the Bureau of Land Management
 #23 Nature most powerful economic engine
 #24 Sage grouse: The spotted owl of the desert
 #25 Oft-quoted "speech" of Chief Seattle a myth
 #26 How "green" is your electricity?
 #27 Global warming: Invest now or pay later
 #28 The Human Footprint
 #29 A tradition isn't always worth keeping
 #30 Increase supply to alleviate wilderness shortage
 #31 Burden of proof should be on polluters, not children
 #32 It's time to question growth
 #33 Save the primates and free Willy
 #34 Moving Loop Road would save salmon, more
 #35 Being green helps company earn more green
 #36 Naming wilderness after Hatfield is wrong
 #37 Skiing through the public trough
 #38 Amphibians on Earth like canary in coal mine
 #39 Consensus groups can deplete democracy
 #40 Gender-bender chemical may make men less manly (submitted, not run)